Never Get Together with Someone You "Meet" Online
The biggest danger to your safety is if you get together with someone you "meet" online. Remember, you never know for certain if people you meet online are who they say they are. If you do feel it's appropriate to meet with someone, discuss it with your parents and never go to the meeting by yourself.
Arrange to meet in a public place, like a coffee shop or mall that you (not just the other person) are familiar and comfortable with, and never go alone. The safest procedure is to have your parents talk with the parents of the other person and for both of you to bring your parents along on the first meeting.
Never Respond to E-mail, Chat Comments, or Newsgroup Messages that are Hostile, Belligerent, Inappropriate, or in Any Way Make You Feel Uncomfortable
It isn't your fault if you get a message that is mean or in any way makes you feel uncomfortable. If you get such a message, don't respond. Instead, show it to your parents or a trusted adult to see if there is anything you can do to make it stop. Sending a response just encourages the person.
Talk With Your Parents About Their Expectations and Ground Rules for Going Online
It's important that you and your parents are on the same channel when it comes to your online activities. This includes when you can go online, how long you can stay online, and what activities you can do online. Communicating with your parents doesn't mean that you have to give up your privacy. It just means that you come to an agreement based on mutual trust and understanding. While you're at it, perhaps you can help your parents better understand the Internet, what it can be used for, and how it is helpful for teens.
GUIDELINES FOR PARENTS
Talk With Your Teens About What They Can and Cannot Do Online
Be reasonable and set reasonable expectations. Try to understand their needs, interests, and curiosity. Remember what it was like when you were their age.
Be Open with Your Teens and Encourage Them to Come to You If They Encounter a Problem Online
If they tell you about someone or something they encountered, your first response should not be to blame them or take away their Internet privileges. Work with them to help them avoid problems in the future, and remember - how you respond will determine whether they confide in you the next time they encounter a problem and how they learn to deal with problems on their own.
Learn Everything You Can About the Internet
Ask your teen to show you what's cool. Have them show you great places for teens and fill you in on areas that you might benefit from as well. Make "surfing the net" a family experience. Use it to plan a vacation, pick out a movie, or check out other family activities. This may be one area where you get to be the student and your kid gets to be the teacher.
Check Out Blocking, Filtering, and Ratings
As you may know, there are now services that rate web sites for content as well as filtering programs and browsers that empower parents to block the types of sites they consider to be inappropriate. These programs work in different ways. Some block sites known to contain objectionable material. Some prevent users from entering certain types of information such as their name and address. Other programs keep your kids away from chat rooms or restrict their ability to send or read E-mail. Generally these programs can be configured by the parent to block only the types of sites that the parent considers to be objectionable.
Whether or not it is appropriate to use one of these programs is a personal decision. If you do use such a program, you'll probably need to explain to your teen why you feel it is necessary. You should also be careful to choose a program whose criteria reflects your family's values. Be sure to configure it so that it doesn't block sites that you want your teen to be able to visit.
It is important to realize that filtering programs cannot protect your child from all dangers in cyberspace. To begin with, no program can possibly block out every inappropriate site. What's more, it's possible, in some cases, for the programs to block sites that are appropriate. If you use a filtering program, you should re-evaluate it periodically to make sure it's working for your family.
Regardless of whether you use a filtering program, you should still be sure that your teen follows all of the basic rules listed here. Filtering programs are not a substitute for good judgment or critical thinking. With or without filters, kids and their parents need to be "net savvy."
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