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Triumph over Breast Cancer
By Barbara Pate Glacel, Ph.D.
According to the American Cancer Society, there will be 175,000 new cases of invasive
breast cancer for women in 1999, and 1300 cases for men. Over 43,000 breast cancer deaths will
occur in 1999, not far below the total death count for Americans during the entire 12 years of the
Vietnam war. All women are at risk, and 1 in 9 will be diagnosed with breast cancer during their
lifetimes.
Approximately 70% of breast cancers occur in women with none of the currently identified risk
factors. Early detection is the key to survival. The American Cancer Society recommends that
women over 40 should have annual mammograms, annual clinical examinations, and do monthly
self-exams. For women between the ages of 20 - 39, they should have clinical exams every three
years and do monthly self-exams.
Even with early detection, a diagnosis of breast cancer is devastating news. How does one face a
life-threatening illness with the positive attitude that is proven to help speed recovery and survival?
The diagnosis of breast cancer means addressing serious questions about treatment options. It also
means taking action that allows a focus on personal healing while home; family and career become
secondary.
When I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1996, I knew very little about it. I knew a handful of
people who had survived, or died, from breast cancer. But the details escaped me. My doctor told
me I had invasive ductile carcinoma, and when I repeated that diagnosis to a specialist, I didn't even
remember whether it was carcinoma or melanoma. Both are ugly words, and I didn't want either
one.
The diagnosis made me feel inferior, flawed and helpless. I felt incapable of being mother, wife, or
business executive when I couldn't even control my body. The months of treatment ahead seemed
overwhelming until I began to take charge of my own attitude and my own care.
If you have received the same devastating diagnosis, take charge! Here are some tips to help you
face the road ahead.
Learn as much as you can about breast cancer and the treatment options.
As soon as I was diagnosed, I received Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book from a friend. This is the
most comprehensive book that explains from A to Z about breast cancer and the options for
treatment. It is written in a very readable style and demystifies much of the medical terminology.
Contact your local American Cancer Society. Get their brochures and ask for a visit by a Reach to
Recovery volunteer. This volunteer will be a breast cancer survivor and will bring you reading
material, exercises for post-surgery, and a temporary prosthesis if you are having a mastectomy
without reconstruction.
Check out the many web sites for the latest news. Some of these sites include:
My ParenTime Additional Resources:
Interview your doctors and make your own decisions.
Depending on your diagnosis, you will have different decisions to make. I was faced with decisions
on lumpectomy vs. mastectomy; reconstruction or no reconstruction; if yes to reconstruction, then
implants or a flap procedure; radiation or chemotherapy or tamoxifen or a combination. These
choices are very personal. Be informed and make the decision for your reasons, not your doctor's
reasons. You have the rest of your life to spend with you and, if married, your husband, not with
your doctor. Don't make a hasty decision. Take your time and consider your own lifestyle and future
happiness. No option is carefree, so consider the future maintenance requirements for each option.
Build your own support group.
If a breast cancer support group is available, give it a try. I learned more about living with breast
cancer from other survivors than from medical professionals. Survivors know about wigs,
prostheses, and side effects of treatments. Survivors can explain what clothes will work if you have
a mastectomy without reconstruction, or what future care is required if you have reconstruction.
Equally important, survivors talk about how you feel as the months go on and you realize you must
live as a breast cancer survivor with all the accompanying fears and hopes.
If there is no organized breast cancer support group available, build your own support group of
family and friends. Talk to them about what is happening to you and how you feel. I formed an
e-mail support group of over 100 people, some of whom I have never met. Friends of friends joined
my e-mail group, many of them breast cancer survivors who helped me by telling their own
experiences. Friends who lived far away were able to offer support, love and prayers by
communicating often over e-mail.
Tell people what you need.
Often friends would say to me, "let me know what I can do for you." I felt awkward telling them
what I needed. I learned that it actually helped them feel better if they could help me. So, be
prepared to tell your friends what you need: shopping for you, driving you to treatments, picking up
your child from an activity, bringing a meal, or coming to walk with you or visit with you. Keep your
list near the phone so you are ready to say what it is that you need that day. If there is nothing
specific you need, then assure your friends that the best thing they can do for you is pray for your
recovery. Prayers are the most one can do, not the least.
Spend time with people in pleasant places.
During chemotherapy, my doctor asked me to avoid crowds and places with children. When I was
alone too much, I felt very isolated and lonely. It is very important to be with others, to do "normal"
things, and to be socially involved. Isolating yourself can cause depression and impedes healing. If
you can't get out, then ask people to visit you. When my blood counts were very low, I wore a
surgical mask. Friends won't mind wearing a mask if they can visit you and cheer you up.
When my counts were higher, my husband made every effort to get me away from the site of my
illness. During chemotherapy, we made some wonderful trips to favorite places and new places.
When I got tired, we were sure not to overdo, but it gave us a happy time in the midst of illness.
Find reasons to laugh.
My e-mail support group held contests. One was the top ten reasons to have cancer. Another was
the top ten reasons to be bald. This took a frightening occurrence and forced us to find advantages.
A positive attitude is a tremendous asset in healing. My favorite response, from a bald male friend
was:
If you think your hair is more important than your brains, it probably is...
At home, my daughters and I watched old home movies together, and we enjoyed great belly laughs
as we watched the antics of the three girls when they were little. Friends supported my efforts at
humor by sending e-mail jokes and funny stories, so I had several laughs a day.
If you are having chemotherapy, cut your hair first.
There are several reasons to cut your hair very short before having chemotherapy. First, losing your
hair is very messy! It comes out over a period of days or weeks and gets on everything. Shower
drains, pillowcases and washing machines are full of hair. The shorter you cut it, the less mess.
Secondly, if you cut your hair off before it begins to fall out, then you are in charge. No one takes it
from you. You decide when you lose it (up until about the first two weeks after your first
chemotherapy session), so you feel as though you have beaten the "system." That is a big
psychological advantage.
Third, trying on wigs is a lot easier without a full head of hair. I bought a wig before I cut my hair off
and tried to replicate my mid-length style. What a disaster! I never wore the wig even after spending
too much money on it. My success with wigs came when I ordered several synthetic wigs from a
catalogue that allowed returns. I was able to try them on in the privacy of my own home and decide
what would work best for me, then return the ones I didn't want. I found that the synthetic wigs
looked absolutely natural and were totally care free.
Exercise your affected arm and your whole body.
Daily exercise will help you have more energy even when treatments may drag you down. Continue
any exercise regimen you did before cancer, or begin walking daily in order to get out and keep
active. I found myself getting too lethargic when I didn't get out and walk.
Arm exercises are vitally important if you have a lymph node dissection. While it hurts to stretch that
arm, it will help prevent an even more painful frozen shoulder. The American Cancer Society Reach
to Recovery volunteer will give you a book about arm exercises and will demonstrate how to do
them at home. Be sure your doctor agrees that you may begin them without affecting stitches.
I did physical therapy following treament that included lymph massage, and that helped reduce
swelling and lymph edema.
Take stress out of your life.
This is a time to concentrate on getting well. Say "no" to all those nonessential tasks. For once in
your life, put yourself first and be a bit selfish. The business trip can be taken by a colleague or done
by teleconference. The brownies for the school bake sale can be bought or baked by someone else.
Only do those things that nurture your body and soul and focus on healing. The healing from a life
threatening disease is as much mental as physical.
If you work, you may even consider going on disability during extended treatment. This was my
choice, although I have many friends who have worked through extended treatment. Consider what
are your job demands and whether you are being fair to both yourself and your employer. You will
not be as productive on the job during treatment. You will heal faster if you focus on yourself first.
Pamper yourself.
It is hard to feel beautiful with scars, a missing breast, radiation burns, or when bald. Spend time on
yourself during this treatment. Get a weekly massage. Get regular manicures or pedicures. Go to a
make-up specialist and learn how to change your make-up when you lose your eyelashes and
eyebrows. The American Cancer Society's Look Good Feel Better program offers free
consultations.
If you don't have time, energy or money for professional treatments, take long baths. Use nice bath
oil or bubble bath and make yourself feel special. It is relaxing and invigorating, giving you more
energy to focus on your own heeling.
Triumphing over breast cancer is a goal for all women and men who suffer from this disease. Our
friends and families can support this goal by traversing this lonely path with us. Studies have shown
that breast cancer patients with supportive families and friends do better in their treatment. Let's join
together to triumph-and to find a cure for breast cancer!
Barbara Pate Glacel, Ph.D. is the chief executive officer of VIMA
International-The Leadership Group, in Burke, Virginia. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in
December 1996 and had a modified radical mastectomy, chemotherapy, and 16 months of physical
therapy due to surgical complications. She is the author of a memoir on her cancer experience, due
to be published in 2000. Contact Barbara. Reprinted with permission from Article Resource Association.
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